Isolation

I'm tired...that is the constant state I find myself in. I'm either at work or in classes. Of course I find time to hang out with my buddies (even when I should probably be resting).

Anyway...isolation. Have you ever wanted to be just left completely alone? Things that you didn't notice before annoy you now? Lately, I've been looking for isolation. Just me, myself, and God. At first I thought I wanted a relationship and even though that sentiment hasn't exactly changed I'd rather be alone right now.

Nowadays, I come to my apartment from classes or work and I go straight to my room and close the door. I don't really interact with my roomies and I find myself avoiding certain people. Part of it has to do with the fact that I don't feel connected to them anymore. Like part of me has been cut off from them. I'm not sure how to feel about that...mostly I just ignore it.

The end of my junior year is quickly coming to a close and I guess I'm starting to realize the changes I need to make. So I've declared Summer 2011 as the summer of isolation. It may sound horrible to some people but it sounds like heaven to me. It's what I need. A chance to live on my own and figure some things out. I'm trying to get back on track but I find that there are some things that still have quite a pull on me (and the worst is that I consider to let myself be pulled). So the best option is to distance myself from the distractions and interruptions.

I need a break from people. It may seem weird or hurtful to some but it's something I want. So I'll be hiding out, and if anyone's looking for me...well good luck trying to find me.

-->J. Lowe